For those who know me well they know I have a tendency to put others needs and ambitions before my own. I never saw this as a flaw but an attribute. I like to help people and I like to encourage people. But as I give of myself to others I leave nothing for me. I stress and worry about others more than I do myself. So much so that when I am stressing about myself I become overwhelmed and usually that leads to an onset of an anxiety attack. It is interesting that I have spent so much time on other people, enjoying helping them so much that I have failed to take care of myself.
But this really didn’t dawn on me until I starting my weight loss journey. Weight loss isn’t all physical a huge part is mental. Some people in my life that I enjoyed helping are the same people who keep me stagnant. They encourage bad eating habits….bad habits in general, question my reasoning for things and get mad when everything isn’t all about them! It is amazing how people’s true colors appear when the spotlight is off them. I am not going to lie it hurts. But it is a reality check. Not everyone is going to be your cheerleader even if you were theirs. Not everyone who started this journey with me will be there at the finish line. I am allowed to be selfish and put myself first. I don’t need to apologize for my choices or my actions to better me. It is about time that I nourish and care for me.
Lesson Learned: It is okay to love and care for others as long as you don’t forget to love and care for yourself. Be selfish.